Friday, August 7, 2009
Our Little Girl
This past Monday (August 3rd) we had our anatomy ultrasound. It was a very neat appointment. The nurse showed us just about every little part of our baby! We saw the feet, the hands, the bones, the heart, the spine, the blood flow. . . .and we heard the baby's heartbeat again. I love that sound!=) Every time we go to an ultrasound it makes me more and more excited about meeting this new little life!=) How incredible is God? To give us a gift like this and then allow us to watch the beauty of her life unfold before our very eyes. . . it's very humbling.
I have a problem, though. I tend to hold on to her a little too tightly. Sounds strange, doesn't it? But see, the thing is, she's not really mine and Frank's. This precious little gift is just that. A gift. From the One who loves us the most. So you see, the problem isn't in being thankful for her or enjoying all of these wonderful moments with her. The problem lies in me forgetting that she doesn't belong to us. I think instead that I'm entitled to her and that it's my right to have her. It seems as though it's a constant battle to remember that the only thing I'm "entitled" to is eternal damnation. And even that's covered by the blood of Christ (If we but only ask)! How much God loves us!!!
Now, you might be thinking, well, that's not that bad of a problem and why is she going off on such a tangent now? I'll answer the question first. During our appointment on Monday, the doctor noticed something that he told us we didn't really have to worry about, but he wanted to let us know about anyway (Don't you love it when they say that?). There seems to be a Choroid Plexus Cyst in our little girl's brain. According to the doctor, our little girl looks great - she's developing well and there are no other indicators of abnormalities in her body. So the doctor told us that this cyst will more than likely go away by my 3rd trimester. The concern with the cyst is that it could be an indicator of a chromosomal abnormality. However, since our tests for this came back so well and I'm not in the high risk range and because our baby girl is developing normally, the doctor doesn't see much to be concerned about. But most of you know me. What do you think I did as soon a I got home? Yep, I googled it.=) I probably read a good 3 or 4 articles. Now they all said the same thing and it all matched pretty well with what the doctor said. But here comes the problem and the answer to the first statement. . . .I tend to worry. And then I tend to become afraid. And then I hold on too tightly. Because you see, if I have the right frame of my mind, I wouldn't worry. She's not mine to begin with - she's the Lord's. And I wouldn't be afraid - He loves her much more than I do and He loves Frank and I so much that He ALWAYS has our best in mind. And, finally, I would learn to let go of this beautiful gift - For if she's not mine and if He truly loves her, then He has her best in mind as well. So I can rest assured in the presence of my Savior that He has her in the palm of His hand and that His will be done. Please join us in praying that we would learn to give our precious baby girl back to Him and the she would learn to mightily serve the One who gave her life!!=) For that is our truest prayer for our daughter. More than anything, that she would live her days in service to the greatest love of all - Jesus Christ.
"Behold, what manner of love the Father has bestowed on us, that we should be called children of God!" 1 John 3:1
"But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:8
Her Tiny Little Feet
It's a Girl!
19 Weeks Old